Daddy Issues

Many believe the initiation to fatherhood is the first time a baby projectile poops on them.

I disagree.

The true initiation to fatherhood is the first time a daddy reaches down to pick up his little one only to place them firmly on their shoulders.

My dad – like all dads, is a super hero genius.

No really, he is.

When I was little, he would place me on his shoulders, holding on to my feet, so that I could have a higher view of the world. While we would walk around endlessly, he would sing renditions of 80’s songs at the top of his lungs – leaving me in a pile of giggles.

You see, my father is a scientist.

A true scientist with a lab, and everything.

He speaks in logic and numbers. It’s what makes him an iridescent success at his passion. While growing up, he never wanted to colour with me, he never wanted to help me brush my barbies’ hair or bake. He simply didn’t care for it. He figured that’s why my sister was for.

Instead he loved to play math games with me, there was nothing more fun then tackling a word problem with him. Those games are what made me the obnoxious mental math diva I am today.

No really, there was a point in time when I’m sure my algebra teacher wanted to punch me in the face for always yelling out answers before she finished asking the question.

Music rarely played in the house, unless of course I was on the piano – and even then, our home was silent. Week days were reserved for reading and studying. I would return home from school at 3:30 waiting in dire anticipation till my daddy would return from work. He would stride through the door with a certain twinkle in his eye. He would secretly place ice cream bars he got for my sister and I in the freezer – and I would stealthily watch from an ajar kitchen door.

That is all he would buy. Nothing else.

After dinner he would watch from the couch as I would tip-toe to the kitchen and grab two. my mother could never know.

Weekends, were a different story.

He would casually tell my mom that he was taking me to his office so I could have peace and quiet while I studied.

My mom, the avid academic would almost always agree.

I would strap myself into his car – and to my surprise, the first thing he would do was turn on the radio.

Had I never went with him to work over the weekends, I would have never known how much he loves country music.

His obsession is Dolly Parton.

It’s weird and gross – but hey – she makes him happy.

We would get to his office and he would transform – from a passive, peace loving, tired father of three, to a super genius scientist.

He would eagerly usher me to his lab and perform magic shows of chemical reactions – it was incredible. His eyes would light up as he would explain polymers, and my eyes would sparkle when I found his hidden stash of Snickers bars.

Image

He would let me play on the white board in his office while he sang tunes and edited papers for publishing.

Years passed, and his little girl slowly grew up to be a bitchy teen and then grew up some more to become a mother herself.

It’s true what they say – when you’re a parent you attain a new found respect for those who raised you.

My dad, like your dad, is a super hero genius.

He’s the music in my life and will eternally be one of the most inspiring people I’ve ever known.

I will always remember those rides on your shoulders, all those ice cream bars you got me, and how you light up when you talk about something you love.

I love you daddy.

Happy Father’s Day.

Sweet Dreams World.

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40 replies

  1. I’m still learning every day how I could have been a better son to my dad. We were never close, but he did love me in his own way. In one way, I am jealous of the relationship you had with your dad, but, at the same time, years from now, I want to have one of my kids call me their “super hero genius” dad.

  2. Okay…ultranerd here, trying to read the labels on the bottles to see if I could figure out what your Dad worked on (assuming it’s a photo from your Dad’s lab).

    Beautifully sweet post…I’ve never known my own father, but having watched one of my brothers with his first born, I would have to agree with you about the shoulder thing.

    It was amazing to watch the idiot I knew as my brother (I’m sure he speaks equally lovingly about me) turn into the most amazing Dad. If my brother were to accomplish nothing else with his life, it would be fine. He has already accomplished so much with my nephew and nieces.

    So good on your Dad, and all the other Dads out there.

  3. That was awesome… as a stay at home father of two girls… that was awesome-sausage-squeezings!!!

  4. Mind you, not everyone has the good fortune of having a great parent.

    Like you, I was lucky to have a loving father who was also my best friend. He was a revenue officer (The Tax Man!). But–becuase he knew I hated Maths and numbers–he never bored or tortured me with Mathematics games! Hallelujah…..

    Instead, we talked about literature and politics. No wonder I have no career, yet. Hmmm…..

  5. lovely tribute shareen. my father was a bas***d. i’m glad you had a good one. x

  6. Very nicely written:). There was a point while my growing up years, when I was closer to my dad than mom. It’s not like that anymore. I miss it but I know he still loves me, his first born!

  7. Nice tribute. Still have no idea what to get my dad lol

  8. Reblogged this on Kcharbneau's Blog and commented:
    Good story.

  9. lovely tribute to your Dad, and to fathers at large. Nicely done.

  10. Thank you Shareen for this lovely post…bringing back your childhood you helped bring back my own…yes, the egoist I am, I loved this walk down memory lane.

  11. Never take a good dad for granted or assume that everyone has one of them. My father was and is the most apathetic person I’ve ever met. He only has time for his sons.

  12. If only I can agree with you. Take good care of your dad! Lovely post.

  13. Oh the rides on the shoulders. I was perched atop my father’s shoulders for so long that my dad jokes that I am the cause of his backaches. The first time he did it with my son, I nearly cried. Great post. πŸ™‚

  14. Your Dad sounds awesome. I was pretty lucky, too : ) He taught me what to look for in a guy, and now my kids have a great Daddy, too.

  15. I had to laugh over your comment regarding algebra teachers – my dad would help me with my math – helping me to understand the material in the book, and then showing me a quicker, easier way to do it, often in my head….
    And yes, he was there to soothe me when I got in trouble for ‘not showing my work’ – – πŸ˜€
    Great Post!

  16. It took me too long to appreciate the man my dad is, but our odd relationship grows a bit each day. Thank you for sharing your story.

  17. WOWWW … This is great. I love story, the power of story, the sacredness of story. I appreciate, deeply, your tribute to your father and your writing. I will be checking in for a day in the life of Shareen … So keep writing. Oh … by the way, thanks for stopping by the Wilder Man on Rolling Creek blog … Appreciate that.

  18. Beautiful, Shareen, absolutely beautiful.

  19. I hope my daughter remembers me like you do your father. There are many things that make her light up, seek me out, that she can’t want to share with me. I love that about her. My son is struggling in a very teenage way, but I know I have given him much to be proud of. I hope it’s the good things that he remembers, not the struggles with me.

    You described your father as tired. I can relate.

  20. actually the beginning of fatherhood and bonding with my children was during the pregency, I spend my time rubbing her belly and talking to our children so that when they came out the bond was there.

  21. Day’s and Grandpa’s too I reckon. Both my cousin and my brother were determined that Pa could fix popped balloons, he fixed everything else!

  22. You’ve melted my heart like an ice cream bar in the sun. Beautiful, thank you.

  23. Almost made me cry (almost!!!). Your Dad sounds brilliant. Unfortunately, like another commenter alluded to, not all Dads are super heroes. My dad’s not a bad father, far from it, but I think its the warmth and willingness to be silly, playful and tender that makes a great dad. There’s nothing wrong with a single parent family when a dad is a dead beat, but having a great dad makes the most well adjusted people IMHO, Your dad sounds like my granddad who died when I was 11 and I still miss him. So I rise my glass of Rose to all the great dads out there. I hope my kids think I’m one.

  24. So awesome! Thanks for sharing, and thanks for reading!

  25. there comes a time where your dad starts behaving like your teenage son …. for me i am living that life…lol.. AND
    i loved this post
    Peace and Regards!!! : )

  26. This is beautiful. Thank you! πŸ˜€

    -roro
    maybeitsaboutroro.wordpress.com

  27. Very good writing, Shareen.
    BTW, thank you for liking my “I, totally, stole that Super Bowl ring” blog post at hogbeatty.wordpress.com.
    I like your Gravatar photo: I got a whiff of the Sharpie you’re holding in your teeth and the unicorn appeared in my living room.
    Good times!

    Best regards,
    Jeff

  28. That was very sweet. And inspirational for us fathers-to-be.

  29. Great story!! And I’m sure if your dad read it, he would be so happy at the impact he had on you and the fond memories you have. Awesome!!

  30. I hope my own kids can write something as sweet as this about me someday. Inspiring story.

  31. I enjoyed the sharing of your childhood memories – great post!

  32. Beautiful post. When I was young, I used to ride on my dad’s shoulders – while he drove the car! (Ah, the days before mandatory seat belts…). My mom says it’s why his shoulders were kinda stooped. But we were happy.

  33. How blessed you are to have such a wonderful father. How blessed he is to have you in his life. A touching story–thank you for sharing so well we were almost there with you.

  34. Thank you for visiting. That is a very sweet reflection to a father… I do hope my ten year old daughter will grow up to have something similar to reflect on about me… these days, I am not allowed to hold her hands while dropping her off at school in front of her friends cause “dad, it’s not cool” 😦

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